“If you need me, don’t ask.”
There may be more graceful ways to put someone off, but few things will bring freedom to a life like learning to say “no.” It’s something Mitchell Tenpenny has dealt with in therapy, learning to form boundaries — and his new single “Ain’t My Problem,” released by Riser House to country radio via PlayMPE on Sept. 9, embodies that life lesson in the form of a fist-pumping anthem.
“This industry easily makes you try to please everybody, and it’s just impossible,” the singer says. “So this song for me is kind of healing. It’s like, ‘Look, that’s not my problem no more, man. I got so many other things to focus on.’”
When Tenpenny and his co-writers first tried to write the song, they really did have other things grabbing their attention. It was Aug. 14, 2025, the first day of a writing retreat hosted by Winsongs Music at a house on Florida’s Navarre Beach, owned by the publishing company’s founder, songwriter-producer Chris DeStefano (“From the Ground Up,” “Something in the Water”). DeStefano had hooked up a new piece of gear to his digital audio workstation, and the program downloaded a driver that clashed with Ableton, a ProTools-like music creation platform. The program froze repeatedly after recording a small amount of audio.
“That whole morning was soul-crushing for probably two or three hours,” DeStefano recalls.
The issue did, however, create the right emotional atmosphere to write a song like “Ain’t My Problem.” They pointedly made it energetic, which worked like a metaphoric release valve to exorcise their tech-related angst. DeStefano kicked into a quasi-rock groove on acoustic guitar, and the guys launched into a chorus about shaking off uncontrollable hassles and restoring positivity.
In a related move, Tenpenny and co-writer Andy Albert (“Somewhere Over Laredo,” “Bigger Houses”) announced that they wanted to use whatever lyrics presented themselves instead of obsessing over every word.
“We both were just like, ‘This time, we’re going with the first answer that comes to our head,” Tenpenny recalls.
As a result, the work went fast. Tenpenny thought the musical foundation would benefit from amping up the sound, so DeStefano doubled the acoustic guitar with an electric model. He also threw in a Mexican-made Fender Precision bass with an ascendant, four-note pattern in the chorus that emphasized the tension in the unresolved passages of that section.
“The strings are literally decades old,” DeStefano says. “I tried replacing them once, and the bass just didn’t sound the same, so I put the old strings back on. But because the strings are so old, it just has … this thuddy kind of tone to it. It just oozes inspiration.”
They found, within that chorus, a number of ways to essentially say “leave me alone,” refusing to buy into the dramas that others consider a priority: “If you need me, don’t ask,” they summarized in the fourth chorus line. Tenpenny changed the phrasing in the next line, and the room stumbled on a new phrase that sounds like it should already be a bumper sticker: “I’m giving up on giving a damn.”
“All the lines in the chorus are something you’ve probably thought or said,” notes co-writer Thomas Archer (“Get to Drinkin’,” “Hurricane”). “I think that’s what makes it relatable.”
To set up the chorus’ boundary-making, they developed a handful of annoyances for the opening frame: a pissed-off girlfriend, a hangover and a couple of car problems — including a lit-up check-engine light and a pierced tire.
“I had just bought new tires like six months prior, and already had three nails in ‘em, and all three in different tires,” Tenpenny recounts. “I’m just repairing tires, patching them up. We were talking about things, and I was like, ‘Tires, man. They’re driving me crazy right now.’”
The second verse addressed specific steps to mitigate the stress, including a margarita, a little romance or fishing. Even though they were working near the water, they were determined not to make it a beach song, but that verse walked right up to the edge of the surf.
“I just love the line right before the chorus: ‘I’m drawing a line in the sand,’” Tenpenny says. “That was my beach line, but also a good metaphor. ‘Look, hey, I’m putting up some boundaries.’”
For the bridge, they wrote as if there was no future or past — “I’m livin’ right here right now” — focusing instead on the moment at hand.
“You’ll stress yourself to death trying to control things that are out of your control,” Archer says.
A few months later, they made a few revisions. There wasn’t much leftover material to work with from the day they wrote it, but Tenpenny wanted to change the first verse, in particular. He wanted to avoid making romantic relationships a stressor, so they changed the pissed-off girlfriend to a boss. They also decided that covering the check-engine light and tires was more automotive turmoil than they needed. So the dashboard problem became a phone “lighting up like a Christmas tree.”
“I think everyone would be happier,” Archer notes, “if they kept [their cell] on Do Not Disturb more often.”
DeStefano played the bulk of the instruments, though they had Nir Z replace a programmed drum part with real drums. Tenpenny powered through a range of vocals — the lead, harmonies and some answer lines that provided counter melodies. He also let out a whistle in the second verse.
“Whistles are so weird,” he says. “I’ve tried them on a few songs, and they never work, but that one just felt kind of cool in the background.”
Meanwhile, Tenpenny asked off the roster at Sony Music Nashville, leaving him solely at River House, which he co-owns. In May, the company hired executive VP of promotion and artist brand strategy Shane Allen, who’d worked with Tenpenny at Sony. The team agreed on “Problem” as Tenpenny’s first single since he transitioned out of Sony, and it’s the first new single released since Allen came on board.
“It’s quintessential Mitchell,” Allen says. “He has those anthemic sing-alongs with a monster hook, wrapped in vivid imagery. It is completely Mitchell up and down, just a great way to kick off the new chapter.”
Tenpenny sang it live with a full band for the first time on Sept. 18 at the Val Air Ballroom in West Des Moines, Iowa. And it’s already aired at WWKA Orlando, Fla.; WXBM Pensacola, Fla.; KSOP Salt Lake City, Utah; and KXIA Marshalltown, Iowa; among others.
Thanks in part to his new focus on boundaries, Tenpenny’s less stressed, more focused and more energized. That commitment is embedded in “Ain’t My Problem.”
“I’m feeling motivated more than I have in a long time,” he says. “I want to share what got me to that point.”
