Noah Kahan has jokingly called for Congress to get involved and force his fans to wear diapers to gigs, following people shitting and peeing on the floors of his shows.
The ‘Stick Season’ singer has had to tell fans numerous times now how to conduct themselves when they are attending his gigs, following multiple instances where fans have soiled themselves while stood in the audience, rather than go to one of the bathrooms provided.
A few weeks ago at a show in Philadelphia, it was revealed that a female fan defecated near the stage as he performed, and soon afterwards at another gig on the tour, various reports emerged about another woman in attendance at the show, who allegedly urinated on another fan’s purse mid-concert.
“If you have to poop at a show please dear god just go to the bathroom lmao,” Kahan wrote on X after hearing about the two instances. “I’ve pooped my pants as much as the next 29 year old but you guys gotta understand there’s a venue worker out there with a 1,000 yard stare after dealing with that.”
If you have to poop at a show please dear god just go to the bathroom lmao I’ve pooped my pants as much as the next 29 year old but you guys gotta understand there’s a venue worker out there with a 1000 yard stare after dealing with that
— Noah Kahan (@NoahKahan) June 27, 2026
He then told fans off mid-performance at another gig, and made them all take a pledge to do better at not-soiling themselves at his shows.
“Please don’t do it,” he said, before making them say back to him: “I solemnly swear I will not shit my pants. And if I do, I won’t take it from my pants and put it on the floor.”
Now, Kahan has made his plea once again, pretending to call US Congress mid-show and requesting that they make it law that fans should wear diapers to his concerts.
Noah Kahan has concertgoers take a pledge at his show tonight: “I solemnly swear I will not shit my pants and if I do, I won’t take it from my pants and put it on the floor”
byu/hairtie1 inFauxmoi
While performing in Washington D.C., the singer used the “Dial Drunk” section of his show – where he acts out a phone conversation mid-show – to pretend that he was on the phone with senators.
“Oh, Congress? Yeah people have been pissing all over the floor at my shows,” he said, looking out at the audience and holding a phone up to his ear.
He then told the crowd that a legislation had been passed “ordering everyone to wear diapers”, and added: “You heard Congress, fucking put some diapers on next time, y’all.”
@viewithphie Noah Kahan’s dial drunk call in DC tonight #noahkahan #concert #dc
♬ original sound – phie
This isn’t the first time Kahan has had to scold his fans for their lack of etiquette at his shows. Last month, the singer pleaded with fans to stop stealing a street sign that he referenced in his song ‘The View Between Villages’.
It is unclear how many times exactly the sign has been nicked, but it’s become such a nuisance to local people that Kahan has offered to “pay for any replacements”.
Oddly enough, Kahan isn’t the only singer to speak out about poor hygiene from fans at shows too. Earlier this week, an investigation was launched after a Morgan Wallen fan allegedly urinated on a family of four – refusing to leave the show for a moment to go to the bathroom mid-set.
Last month, Olivia Rodrigo also spoke out about instances at her show, saying that she has “smelled” hardcore fans who wear diapers to be front row.
Noah Kahan released his fourth studio album, ‘The Great Divide’, on April 24, and has since announced a world tour. He plays around Australia and New Zealand in September and October, before heading to the UK and Ireland in November and then mainland Europe. You can find all the dates here and the remaining tickets here.
