Harry Styles ‘Really Struggled’ With ‘Strange’ Pressure to Publicly Share His Grief Over Liam Payne

Harry Styles just gave fans a rare look into his grief over former One Direction bandmate Liam Payne, who died more than a year ago after falling from the third-floor balcony of a hotel room in Buenos Aires.

While speaking to Apple Music 1’s The Zane Lowe Show in an interview posted Wednesday (March 4), the British pop star expressed that “even the idea of talking about” his friend’s death is something he wrestles with still. “I think there was a period when he passed away where I really struggled with kind of like acknowledging how strange it is to have people kind of like own part of your grief in a way,” Styles told Lowe.

“I have such strong feelings around my friend passing away,” he continued. “And then suddenly being, you know, like aware of there’s maybe a desire from other people of you to convey that in some way, or it means you’re not feeling what you’re feeling or something, you know?”

Styles is likely referring to the way fans naturally looked to him — as well as the rest of the surviving 1D members — to speak out almost immediately after Payne passed away. Following the news that the “Strip That Down” singer had died on Oct. 7, 2024, with toxicology reports later finding he’d had multiple substances in his system at the time, the Pleasing founder addressed the loss in both a personal statement and in a joint memorial post with his ex-bandmates.

“I will miss him always, my lovely friend,” Styles wrote at the time individually, while his joint message with Niall Horan, Zayn Malik and Louis Tomlinson read, “The memories we shared with him will be treasured forever. We will miss him terribly.”

“It’s so difficult to lose a friend,” the Grammy winner elaborated in his interview with Lowe. “It’s difficult to lose any friend, but it’s so difficult to lose a friend who is so like you in so many ways.”

“It’s like, I saw someone with the kindest heart, who just wanted to be great,” he added. “It was a really important moment for me in terms of taking a look at my life and being able to say to myself, ‘OK, what do I want to do with my life? How do I want to live my life?’ And I think the greatest way you can honor your friends who pass away is by living your life to the fullest.”

The interview comes two days ahead of the March 6 release of Kiss All the Time. Disco, Occasionally, Styles’ first album in four years. It’s also his first album since Payne’s death.

Watch Styles’ full interview with Zane Lowe for Apple Music 1 above.